


The Worst Way To Consider The Possibility Of a Sibling...

by Of_Princes_and_Savages



Series: Fake Fiances and True Love [6]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Emma isn't helping, Implied Sexual Content, Nothing explicit, Poor Neal, but c'mon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 10:27:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10592109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Of_Princes_and_Savages/pseuds/Of_Princes_and_Savages
Summary: Emma is unsure what has Neal so rattled, but she was not expecting that.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I believe it was Stillsearching-47 that asked if Neal thought about the possibility for siblings. Here's a good answer. :)

Emma had been waiting on Neal to meet her for lunch at Granny's Diner when he rushed through the door with a look on his face like he had seen a ghost.

"Emma!" he plopped down on the stool beside her. "I just thought of something."

"Uh...what?"

"Babies."

Emma leaned away from him slightly, studying her boyfriend carefully. Neal wasn't the drink-a-drink-in-the-middle-of-the-workday kinda guy, really, but maybe he'd had a bit of a nip before coming in. Because they were not having kids until they had talked that subject all the way out, and they weren't gonna even talk about that until they had a significant few years together-

"Oh, whoa!" Neal threw his hands up. "Whoa, not like-No, uh, lemme start over."

"Yeah. Do that."

"Okay, what I meant was: Babies. Not my own, but like...baby siblings."

Oh. Well. That was a horse of a very, _very_ different color. Phew.

Emma leaned her elbows on the counter, picking through her fries. "Isn't your dad a little...and I don't mean to sound ageist here, but, isn't he a little old for that?"

Neal grimaced. Ruby came over and he ordered a BLT and Coke, before he nervously started tapping on the counter.

"Okay, so...my apartment building had to be fumigated last week, so I stayed with my dad and Belle. Right?"

"Right..." Emma nodded, wondering where this was going. It seemed to be a change of topic.

"So, when I went to move back in, I forgot a bag. I knew exactly where I left it, right on the bed, so when I got off work Monday I went over that evening to pick it up. And y'know, it's a Monday. What happens on a Monday night?..."

* * *

_Neal used his key to step into the foyer, letting himself in. He'd just be in and out of Papa's house, grab his bag and go home. His father and stepmother of five months had him underfoot all weekend, so it'd be best for all of them to have a little time to themselves. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and such._

_"Hey Papa? Belle? I'm just gonna grab a bag I left, alright?" he called out before mounting the stairs. It was only about a quarter past seven, they might be out at dinner, or maybe not._

_He passed by Papa's door and heard a low noise, but didn't think much about it because his father was a big snorer. Snorist? Snoree? What did you call someone that snores? No. Snorer, that was right, probably._

_Neal found the bag right where he left it, and slung it over his shoulder, mission accomplished. That was when he heard the thump._

_He came out the room and heard another low noise, one that sounded more like a pained groan. Neal's heart stopped as an image of his father lying on the floor passed through his mind's eye. He had that bad ankle from a car accident, his balance and mobility were impaired. What if he'd, y'know, fallen and couldn't get up?_

_Pressing an ear to the door, Neal heard another moan._

_"Pops? Papa?" he reached for the knob, finding it turned easily._

_"Neal?" Wait, was that Belle's voice? "Neal! No!"_

_But as the door swung open-_

_Yeah. That was Belle shrieking and folding her arms to hide her lacy bra._

_God._

_Neal wasn't sure what he was seeing and he spun around so he couldn't see it anymore. Skin. Lots of skin. Too much skin. He'd seen more of his father than his father's girlfriend, of course, but that was hardly comforting. He never,_ ever _needed to know his father had a smooth chest. Good god. He was torn between being grateful Belle was straddling him and-_

 _"I'm just gonna...gonna go...go wash my eyes out,_ oh my god _," he hurried away from the tainted place as fast as his legs could carry him._

 _"What the_ hell _were you doing here?!" Papa yelped, but nothing could make Neal turn around._

 _"I forgot a bag! My mistake! Just go back to-_ I WAS NEVER HERE _!"_

* * *

"...and let me just say," Neal held up his hands, with a haunted look on his face. "That something was happening, and it is very conducive to making babies."

Emma pressed her lips together, trying to hold in a laugh that was probably inappropriate...

She failed.

"Okay," she giggled, helpless. "So what you're telling is me is that your dad and Belle are doing it-"

"Ugh! Don't-Don't remind me."

"-and that...scares you? Scars you?"

"Well, it _scars_ , yeah," Neal shuddered. "My dad either shaves his chest or I got chest hair from my mom's side, which is a whole other can of worms. I guess my point really is...like...what the hell am I supposed to do if they have kids? Since obviously they have a rather...an active..."

"Sex life?"

"Eww. Don't-"

"They had _sex_." Emma snickered.

"Stop it!"

"They're making babies."

"Emma!" Neal turned bright red, down his neck and everything. "Have mercy on my ears, please!"

"Okay, I'm sorry," she said, squeezing his hand. "So...are you like, worried your dad might not love you as much, or are you potentially jealous...?"

Neal scrunched his nose up, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "I don't think so? Not...really? It's just-It's just that Belle's younger than me. Papa's fifty. It's really, really weird for me to have a half-sibling when I'm a whole generation older. It's just...it's freaking weird."

Well when he put it like that, it was. Actually, there was no conventional way of looking a Neal's family that wasn't weird. So...Emma decided to look at it from another perspective.

"Was your dad a good father to you?"

"Papa? Yeah. I mean we had our spats when I was a teenager but we didn't kill each other or have to move to different countries so-"

"And do you think Belle will take off if things get tough?"

"No."

"So what's weird? That sounds like good parents to me." Emma shrugged. "That seems a lot more important than age factors, don't you think?"

Neal was quiet for a moment. Ruby finally came back with his order, and Emma thought he had let the matter drop when he took a bite out of an onion ring.

"I'm still pretty scarred for life, but..." he smiled. "I guess that's why I'm overthinking it."

Emma smiled back, lightly punching his arm. "You've got a right to be scarred. Kids shouldn't have to walk in on their parents. So, on to different news. Did it look like they were having fun?"

"Oh god," he gagged on his onion ring. "Please, let it drop."

"I love you."

"Love you too, but no."

"So no fun?"

"Ugh..."


End file.
